breathefuture.

when they come, I need you to be here for me
it will be fine
just hold my hand
they'll be dressed in white and playing with big words
you'll be scared
it's all I ever needed was for you to be here for me
I'm not perfect, I promise
but I'll try so hard for you
you'll see shaking and braces
you will never see me again
my skin will come off
they'll tidal wave in and wash away just as fast
everything will be clean
sanitation-style
but regardless of what you learn
just know that I love you
I really, really love you

manica.

I'm blind in here, shaking it out
staccato heart beats
stains and sin
leave the windows open so the air can dance
shadows on the walls like
ghosts of the people we're lying to
The Audience Translucent
the last time I felt this, ______________
collecting memories
injecting them in my veins
paranoia pheromones
my perception is so wretched
details, details!
just enjoy the night
and leave your rings on my bedside

marionette.

time spent without, oh so draconian
quiet rooms and loud thoughts
your existence is an impossibility
I'm flawed for having such a necessity
my pedestals are way too encumbered
and my arms are still empty

I think I'll stop writing for a while
cut the strings

turning/tossing.

I'm betting on temper tantrums stacked high against possibilities and people betting on you using your ears instead of your heart, closing your eyes and shutting out the world when it doesn't spin your way, fashioning your lips into weaponry and ignoring the poltergeist instead of exorcising it, writing lettings about magnanimous impregnation and stuffing them deep into my pocket while I bet on temper tantrums, my words never lie, my words will never lie, emotion-filled hard drives uninstalled and looped endlessly like beautifully delayed feedback controlled with knobs and sentenced to death when it gets too loud for you, I Am The Mile You Walk In Shoes You Haven't Worn Yet, it's simpler than you think when you shut out the sounds, our church is warm and inviting so why wouldn't you build it in the arctic instead of the jungle, Joni Mitchell singing her single while an entire continent vibrates with understanding and what earthquakes feel, I need you as an orchestra heard from inside the pit and not as the sounds of a phonograph heard relentlessly flickering through the breeze from a distant source.

you're a christmas that never comes, you're the reason for dreams, I could bury this so deep and still be afraid of it.
don't try looking for me. just find me already.