through dripping mascara and eyeliner
you once accepted this life laid out before us in nothing more than whispered words
within recent dreams, I get up from off of my knee
and just walk away
out of the Terminal and back into the plane
nothing will ever be the same now like nothing was ever the same since
phases like dirty seasons never clean never static
please
get out of my head get out of my head get out of my head
you don't deserve
____________________________________________
you don't deserve any of it
you never did
quitter
neither did I
quitter
I sit on the banks of where bodies of water meet land, forever staring out
knowing out there somewhere
there is a living breathing organism that I forever and ever can't shake off
two fingers on the underside of where my jaw and neck meet
checking, feeling
indeed I still exist, so as must you
I don't believe in much of anything anymore because you believed in all of it
including us
I'm not chiseled out of stone but I swear I'll never stop trying
he said my mistake was self-improvement
I said don't worry, it never sticks
and I took it off of the finger and tucked it away
cast never-ending letdowns out to sea
(I think that boy's gonna swing soon)
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